my dreams, my thoughts, my battles, my life

Sunday, August 29, 2004
8:20 PM

what happened to all my fuckin entriessss...?

renzi screams again...

hmmzz.... a song in my head right now....oh well time to go back to work... I I STARTED A JOKE

I Started a Joke I started a joke, which started the whole world crying, but I didn't see that the joke was on me, oh no.
I started to cry, which started the whole world laughing, oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes, and I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.

Til I finally died, which started the whole world living, oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes, and I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.

'Til I finally died, which started the whole world living, oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was one me.

renzi screams again...

Hello my dear cousin! =)

Well surprised? Hahah just wanted to write to say a big hello and how are you? How is school?

School for me is pretty much stable? I just ended this major event that I organized (I was the chairperson by the way) and trust me I’m SOO glad that it’s over. I hate conflicts and I got myself into soo many conflicts. Now I will strive to lead a simple life, like paris Hilton (my sister..shhh) hahaha

In a month’s time, I would have stepped down from two of my positions- activities officer(in the international students organization) and secretary(in the Singapore club) whoo! The long-awaited days will finally come! Whee! A couple of people have approached me to run for elections and think I just need a break and probably try to concentrate on my studies =)

I think this is the first time in two years that I have written a physical letter to you right? I really have to apologise for not being a good cousin, relative and friend. I think I’ve been too caught up with so many things that I missed out you and so many others in the life equation- friends. It’s about time that I did something. I’ve been writing and still am writing to the people back home. I mean nothing beats a physical letter right? And hopefully I get replies (*hint* haha) well at least I did my part, writing letters take effort and I think at the end of the day, should I lose some friends still, I know I’ve tried.

Haha think reading a couple of blogs have made me think about a lot of issues I’ve been trying to run away from. Haha do I sound very vague? If so I’m really sorry. Well if you do reply, I shall elaborate further.

So how are you? How’s your stomach? Still giving you problems? If so please for crying out loud, for your mother’s sake, for your father’s sake, for alvin’s sake, for everyone else’s sake (even if you don’t care about yourself), please please seek medication. This is no joke!!! Let me repeat, this is no joke, its your health okay??

Haha I think I’ve quite a bit more to tell you, update you. Think if I tell you even half of what I did you’d be very disappointed in me. I still am and I don’t think I’d be able to forgive myself in a while…sigh

Just want to ask you to pray for me. I’m feeling so lost right now. I’ve got so much to think about right now. What should I do in the future? How should I live my life? I really need guidance. AND I haven’t really had a proper r/s with God for such a long time, I can’t remember when was the last time I spoke to Him and the last time I’ve been to church in aus. Hahah it’s amazing I mean I may seem okay on the outside but man! I don’t know how lost I am. I seem like some zombie walking aimlessly in this world. I’m sure many in my circle of friends are also like that. It’s intriguing that many may seem to be alright confident and self-assured but in actual fact, they are also crying for help!

Think it’d better sign off I need to get some work done. Thanks for reading this long letter and before I end off just wanna say I love you

Ps: I dropped psychology

From Renzi (27/8)

renzi screams again...

hmmm...tired...

You are Lamentations.

Which book of the Bible are you?
brought to you by

renzi screams again...

Saturday, August 28, 2004
10:01 AM

wow

i'm impressed... i like blogging, i like every bit of it believe it or not.

Well this blog is just an avenue for me to type the screamings of my heart, which is sometimes hard to voice out in the real world, or my other world.

nice blogskin. i'm all set to go!

renzi screams again...